Healing
by NikkiB1973
Summary: Bella realizes her heart isn't broken as she once thought. A little drabble set in New Moon AU.


**Healing**

Disclaimer: all characters and copyright belong to Stephanie Meyer.

The beach was deserted; a fact for which Bella was glad. She had just climbed down from the top of the cliff, intending to jump in order to hear _his _voice. Something had stopped her. She couldn't say exactly what. She had stood on the very edge, her arms outstretched and eyes closed as the wind whipped her hair in a frenzy. A smile had curved her lips upwards as she had leaned forward, ready to fall down, down to the wild sea below. _His_ pleading voice had begun to beg her not to do it, not to risk her life. She had whispered. "It's the only way you'll stay with me."

But it hadn't been _him _who had answered. Instead she heard another voice, a voice which was as beloved as _his_ had once been. It had been torn and fragmented by the wind, but she knew who it was who spoke. "Don't Bells. Just wait."

Bella had opened her eyes and stepped back from the edge, the reality of what she had been about to do kicking in. She had swallowed down her fear and raced away from the bluff and headed for the beach instead. She now strolled along the sand, her arms wrapped around her middle as she thought about what she was going to do now...about what she had been doing. The wind increased in velocity and a light rain began to fall, the droplets coating her hair and eyelashes.

The recklessness had to stop. She couldn't do it anymore, the truth was she was tired of seeking _his_ voice. She had to accept _he_ was not going to come back. _He_ had left her, abandoned her in the worst way possible. It was now apparent _he_ had never truly loved her, the thought was debilitating, but the hole in her chest did not gape open and bleed as she expected. Maybe, amidst all the chaos that her life had been of late, she had slowly begun to heal without realizing it.

Bella's arms dropped back to her side as she no longer felt the need to hold herself together. She had survived_ his_ loss despite herself. She had gone on living and would continue to do so. Her heart had been hurt, but not permanently broken as she first thought. She could love again...no she was already _in _love again. She had just refused to see it. Standing taller Bella left the beach and headed to the little red house that had become her sanctuary.

* * *

Jacob was tired, worn down from the long chase. He had followed the red head for miles but she had still managed to elude him. She had eluded them all and this made him angry. He just wanted it be over. He was sick of the constant patrolling, the never ending battle to find rest. Today Harry Clearwater had died unexpectedly of a heart attack; it made him think of the fragility of life. How someone precious could be torn away from you in an instant. His head was full of his mother as he trudged home.

Bella was sitting on the porch steps as he approached. He wasn't expecting her today, although he was glad to see her. He had a sudden burst of adrenaline as he loped over to join her. "Hey." He said in greeting as he put an arm around her automatically.

"Hey." Bella sighed softly and cuddled close to him.

This was new. She never normally got this close. Jacob looked down at her. She had a strange look on her face. "Bells?" He said hesitantly. "What are you thinking about?"

Bella looked up at his beloved face and smiled, a real genuine smile, not one of the fake ones she put on to please others. It lit up her whole face and Jacob was entranced. She looked so beautiful it took his breath away. "You."

"Huh?" He felt confused.

"I was thinking about you." Bella continued. "I was thinking about how much you mean to me and how freaking handsome you are. I was thinking about your smile, the way you hold my hand when I'm scared and the way you have stood by me these past months, even though I haven't given you much back in return. I was thinking that I was wrong when I told you I would never love again, that my heart was irreparably damaged. I was thinking that I love you." She finished, her voice soft and full of certainty.

Jacob was shocked. His mouth dropped open as he stared at her. This day had started out shit and now...he grinned at her happily as her words sank in. He pinched his forearm, just in case he was dreaming. "You mean it?" He checked. "You haven't hit your head again, Bells?"

Bella snorted with laughter and he joined her. They laughed until their stomachs hurt and they could no longer breathe. It felt cleansing. Neither had laughed in such a long time. Bella took his face between her hands and looked at his ecstatic expression. "I love you, Jacob Black." She said again, loving the sound of the words.

Jacob leaned his forehead against hers as he smiled. "I love you too, Bella Swan. Can I kiss you now?"

Bella smirked, yes she actually smirked. Jacob had never seen her do that before. She pushed him away and jumped to her feet. "You've gotta catch me first." She took off at a run.

Jacob tore off after her, the wind feeling fresh on his skin as he caught her easily and swept her up in his arms. She smiled contentedly as he lowered his lips to hers and kissed her passionately, stealing her breath and making her heart race with excitement.

As they continued to kiss a light rain began to fall...

_**A/N-thanks! **_


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